My Home...is Where My Heart is

It's so weird, these past couple of days the only thing that has been on my mind is Salone (ok...like that is different from any other day!). But no, these past days my thoughts have been quite different...I have this urge to actually go home and do something to contribute to what many are calling in Sierra Leone "the rebirth of a nation". I've always planned on going to Sierra Leone in the future but now those feelings and thoughts are weighing down hard on me. Weird...But, with those thoughts then come the other looming thoughts of what can I offer Salone with just a bachelors degree? Perhaps, I could do a year or so of service with my organization's branch chapters out there (there are three branches Makeni, Bo, and Freetown) but then I would have to worry about locating the funding for these events (which is not very easy) and on top of that there are still some things that I have to take care of in Maryland...so I guess, I will just have to wait and see where God leads me because whenever the time is right for Him, everything will work out smoothly on my end.

Oh and by the way, I am a member (former Maryland chapter president for two years) of Youth for Sierra Leone (YSLI). YSLI, is a not-for-profit and non-governmental organization that is devoted to empowering the youths of Sierra Leone through education. YSLI strongly believes that the future of Sierra Leone lies in the hands of its youth. The future of the country will be unpromising, if basic education is not provided for the youth. With the aim of ensuring a prosperous future for Sierra Leone, YSLI has initiated the following three projects: (1) Access to Primary Education for Children (2) Continuing Education for Adolescent Girls and Women (3) Health Services and Education.

YSLI has hosted many events with notable people taking part in them and we have participated in many fundraising activities...one of our more recent feats is the collection of 350 computers that we will be shipping to Sierra Leone next month, so that they can be used in various public schools across the country. Youth for Sierra Leone Improvement is just a promising organization and I thank God for blessing me enough to allow me to serve my nation in such a way. I have so much more to do for mama Salone but being in YSLI has definitely been a good foot in the door (I'm not sure if I said that right...lol).

Anyway, so yeah...those are some of the things that have been going through my mind recently...

One other thing that I have heard some people complaining about that really annoys me is how "the new" APC has not improved anything in the country since they have been in power...My first thought is "Hello!!!! News flash...they have only been in power for approximately 6 months, let us at least give them a chance before we start to criticize!"

*Sidenote*

Just in case you may not have known, runoff elections were held on September 8, 2007 in Sierra Leone between the former government Sierra Leone's People's Party, SLPP, (party leader: Solomon Berewa)and the All People's Congress (APC), in which APC came out victorious winning majority of the votes in the country. So, the new leader of the Republic of Sierra Leone is H.E. Ernest Bai Koroma.

Okay, now back to my rant...yes, they inherited a broken nation that was not only caused by SLPP, but also from the civil war and even the immense damage that the old APC did back when they were in power years ago. So, my whole issue is that it is going to take time to revive such a nation...we just have to be patient and pray that the ones who are in power now will remember all of the suffering that has been imposed on our people for so long.

By no means am I a party loyalist...I happen to be a Sierra Leonean people loyalist though and I love my country, my people, and all of the potential that is within the country just waiting to burst out. My heart aches for those innocent children who have known nothing but hardship all of their lives,who think that these are the cards that they have been dealt in life and that they should just wallow in their own misery. My heart aches for the child that feels like there is nothing in life worth living for and that they can never amount to anything. I want to help in restoring hope in the future generations of Sierra Leone and let them know there is a better tomorrow and that they don't have to become victims of their circumstances...ah life...God help me.

Until next time...I'm signing off and please, please, please...remember mama Salone in your prayers.

A Moment of Reflection...

Soooo....today was somewhat of an uneventful day. I woke up, attempted to study and then it all went downhill from there, lol. It's not that anything bad happened today, it's just that nothing happened at all...I did the usual... checked my facebook, watched some television, talked briefly on the phone, did some reading for one of my classes, checked out the different Sierra Leonean based newspapers for some updates....and that was it. Boring, huh?

Apart from my day, I have been doing a lot of thinking these past few days about my experiences with previous friendships. During that whole thought process, I realized that I really haven't been able to keep any long term friendships. Now, I don't know if it is partly my fault because I tend to withdraw from people when I notice that no longer are after the same things in life, or if it has much to do with the natural process of life, in which people just tend to grow apart as time goes on. In my mind, I seem to find solace in the latter...I have really made myself believe that the reason why most of my old "buddies" and I are no longer as close as we used to be, has much to do with the fact that we no longer share common interests anymore.

Example one: Let's revisit my Belford Towers days, there were four other girls that I spent almost all of my time with...there wasn't anything that we didn't do together, including causing havoc. It's so weird because that was definitely a "love-hate" relationship. I enjoyed being wild and in a sense rebelling side of me, but deep inside I hated the person I was becoming, which eventually led to serious self-image problems. I guess in a way, the things we did were just our cries for attention or a way out...who knows? Nonetheless, I found my way out...unfortunately for 3 out of the other four girls, they never were able to locate that key to unlock the door leading to their way out of what seemed like a small, four-walled room with the walls closing in on us. Sad to say, but now for me as a spectator looking in, things really seem bleak for them because they have allowed their surroundings to define who they are.

Example two: In highschool, especially early on...there was this one girl who I looked up to as my big sister...I mean we did everything together. Whenever you would see her, you would see me...we always bought the same stuff, she was my role model, everything I aspired to be. LoL. I also had other friends at that time, who were the same age as me and I must admit, we really did have fun...But as time went on my big sis graduated, and my other friends ended up leaving my school for one reason or another, causing us all to just kind of lose contact. It's so wierd, all three of my friends just recently had babies, yet I haven't called anyone of them to say congratulations...It's not that I feel like, I am to good to call or anything of that nature...it's just...I feel kind of nervous about the whole thing. I mean what do I say after I say "congratulations on having your baby"? Then what??? What's next? Do I ask them about life as a mother, about their babies...I just really don't know. I guess I am in a way battling with the fact that we were all once so close and always had something to share with one another. So now thinking that there could be a chance of us being on the phone in total silence, makes me just totally shy away from the whole ordeal.

Example three: I can honestly say that my freshman year in college along with part of my sophomore year, were packed full with some of the best experiences in my life. I had a great roommate, and two of my other homegirls were always there to make everything that much better. We did almost everything with eachother and even when there was nothing to do, we still had fun just being bored with one another...campus life was like that, LoL! But, in the midst of it all I met some people that I can honestly say, I wish I had never met before because it really took a toll on my friendship with another one of my closest highschool buddies. As a result of that, it also had an effect on the friendship between my roommate and I, and sad to say, but that close comradity that once existed...has definitely been buried in one of these cemetaries out here. I'm sure we are all familiar with that phrase about turning back the hands of time...yeah well I definitely wish I could do that, but I guess that's life right? You live, you learn, you grow, and then you move on...

Anyway, with everything going on leading into my sophomore year, things were really looking up one of my close buddies and I had just recently gotten our new apartment on campus...believe me, we were definitely doing things that we shouldn't have been doing. So, I am not sure if it was a combination of it all, but one thing led to another and God removed me from that situation. I don't know if he had foreseen things for me that I didn't pick up on or what...nonetheless, he is God...so He definitely knows best! Along with my move from the apart, came the loss of some valuable friendships...the things that once peaked my interest like partying, going out, and blah blah blah, no longer did anything for me anymore...it just became somewhat redundant. It could have very well been because of the circumstances underwhich I left the apartments that really forced me to re-evaluate my life and the people in it, or something else..I really just don't know.

All in all, I still have so much love for all of my old girlies...there are definitely no hard feelings, I just figure that maybe, just maybe things were supposed to happen like this. I am totally in peace with myself, and the friendships that I have developed more recently are irreplaceable...I really do believe in my heart that we are all headed towards similar paths in life, which has helped to stregthen our bond. Either way, I have always been the same Kadija...it's just that along the way, I tweaked some things here and there..and those changes resulted in the loss of some friendships..but hey life definitely goes on!

Ready... Set... ummm...Go???

Okay...so as you all can tell I am new to this whole "blog" thing...but I wanted to try something new and possibly (okay...totally!) jump on the whole blogger bandwagon. So, I'll just wait and see where this goes...bare with me please!

I have created this blog to help me gather my thoughts on issues going on in my life. So basically...this blog will consist of topics concerning my number one passion Sierra Leone, school, and my daily interactions with people...but most likely than not my thoughts on Sierra Leone. LoL, just giving other bloggers and inquirers a heads up!

One of the main things (if you haven't picked up on this yet...) that really led me to embark on this whole bloggers experience was as stated before, my beloved Salone. I always find it so funny how someone who was not born in Sierra Leone, has only visited once in her whole life (for only two weeks might I add!), be so ridiculously in love with the country! Sometimes I wonder what it is about my Salone that I adore so much...is it the people...the beautiful beaches...the spectacular night life...the music....the culture...the backwardness of the country...the lack of a healthcare system that can assist the masses...the corruption...the fact that most of the people live on less than a dollar a day...is it the fact that you can see someone driving down the street with one of the most expensive cars in the world...yet a child will be on that same road selling water (when he or she should be in school) drowning in their own misery??? Or is it a combination of it all...the good and the bad? I just wonder sometimes how a country blessed with so many natural resources and in the perfect location...be plagued by such a heart-wrenching and unfortunate situation? How is it that a country that was once regarded as the "Athens of West Africa", now have an illiteracy rate at about 60-70 percent? Whatever the case may be, I acknowledge Sierra Leone's stregnths and weaknesses and I hope by the grace of God to become one of the key players who will pioneer Sierra Leone to a level of greatness that has yet to be seen in Africa.

Okay...I just want to vent very quickly...I hate the fact that when I google Sierra Leone the things that always pop up are: Sierra Leone: war torn country, second poorest country in the world, blood diamonds, and a whole host of NGOs who are doing work (admirable work, might I add) in Sierra Leone. I mean, I know all of these things are facts, but Sierra Leone has so much more to offer...I guess basically what I am trying to say is that I would like to see more information on how this post war country is making strides, trying to recover from a decade long war...how we just held peaceful elections...that the country is no longer a battle ground...but who knows? One day, right...?

Nonetheless, it's 11:00pm and I have two quizzes tomorrow...yet I am on here blogging, lol. To be honest, I am just feeling really lazy right now and school work is the last thing on my mind. Hmm..but on the bright side, spring break will be coming up in one week!!! Yay!

This semester has been going by pretty fast...lol, even better. For those of you who know me, I am sure you will be able to put two and two together!

Anyway, I think I am really enjoying this whole bloggers world stuff...so like I said before, we will see where it takes me!

Peace!!!